Category: inspiration

Gifts

A few years ago, my sister started including books from Dynamic Catholic with my Christmas goodies. (I haven’t asked, but I imagine she gets them from her deacon husband.) The first time I got one I hadn’t looked in the bag until I got home. When I found the book, I rolled my eyes and tossed it aside. I had no interest in Do Something For God, Essential Teachings of Mother Teresa: 365 Daily Reflections. I thought it would be a good regifting for one of my Catholic friends in Florida who I still needed a Christmas gift for. But as I was packaging it to mail off, an idea hit me. If I got another copy for myself, my friend and I could go through the book together and share our thoughts on the readings with each other. So, I did and we did. We communicated more that year than we had in a long time. It turned out to be a great gift after all! The gift was not the book, but the deepening of a friendship.

Last year I got I Heard God Laugh. I loved the title, but it was another Dynamic Catholic book. I tossed it aside once more as I had other spiritual books I was more interested in reading. Recently I ran across the book again, so began to peruse it. I don’t agree with all of it, but the book does have some really good passages and concepts not dissimilar from our teachings: Embrace your best, truest, highest self; Make prayer a daily practice; Find a joy independent of external realities; etc. I went through the book highlighting passages that resonated with me. I intend to bring it with me next time we have lunch and share it with my sister. Again, the gift was not the book, but the conversation it will bring about.

I used to criticize my mother who would find fault with my presents to her before thanking me for them. I realized I was doing the same with these books from my sister. I did not verbalize my dissatisfaction as my mother had, but it was there. But now reflecting upon the real gifts these books have given me, I graciously accept this year’s edition. It will be interesting to discover the true gift Mother Teresa; In My Own Words has in store for me.

Did you receive a present this holiday season you’re not thrilled with? My stepmother taught me that once a gift is given it is yours to do with as you please. You have no obligation to the presenter to keep it if you don’t like it. You could regift, donate or toss it out. Just don’t do so angrily or with dissatisfaction, but with appreciation for the person who thought enough of you to give you a present. And, before disposing of it, see if you can find the real value in it first.

–Janet Salese

Lost in Translation

When I was in New Orleans earlier this month with an old friend from high school, she talked about how much her little town, which used to be a sleepy backwater sort of place, has grown in the last 20+ years. When she and her husband bought their place, it was out in the country. You had to drive for miles and miles to get to any sort of services – even grocery stores or gas stations. Now their little subdivision is surrounded by oodles of other subdivisions, all sorts of commercial buildings and retail areas, and traffic on the two-lane road is horrible. Her husband is a curmudgeonly, often sarcastic, homebody who really, truly hates change of any sort.

One day when he was grumbling about the traffic, the noise, or the increased number of people, she asked whether he wanted to move further out of town. He said, “No, I just want all those people to go away.” And she said, “That’s not going to happen. What do you want to do?” His totally irrational reply, “Nothing. They just need to go away.” Obviously, that conversation had nowhere (useful) to go. She just dropped it.

The Buddha is quoted as saying, “Life is suffering.” I don’t think that’s a good translation of what he actually said. I have a sneaky suspicion what he actually said was something more like, “Life happens. When we want it to be different than it is, that’s when we suffer. It’s our attachment to our expectations that leave us feeling the most dissatisfied, and disappointed, in our lives.”

Somewhere on my trip back from New Orleans, I lost my keyring with all my house, car, mailbox and office keys on it. (I’ve never done that before.) I discovered this when I was waiting for the off-site parking shuttle to take me to my car. I felt a moment of true panic. I’d hoped I’d left it on the dresser in the hotel. Apparently not. I could have thrown myself a pity-party and suffered because I lost my keys somewhere, but then Reason took over and I worked my way through what I needed first. And then next, and next, and next, and next.

When I asked myself where I wanted to grab supper, I got an answer that delighted me. I hadn’t enjoyed a meal at Zinburger since before the pandemic. When I arrived, I told the young man who was seating people about my dilemma, and he asked me if I’d used the ‘Hotel Tonight app’ to find a hotel. When I looked puzzled, he explained that when he used to travel for work, and got delayed overnight at airports around the country, he’d looked up local hotels on this application. He’d always had a good experience, and recommend I look them up. After I placed my dinner order, I pulled up the app for Tucson, and the first hotel that popped up was one pretty close to my house that I’d been curious about, and the available rate was less than the published rate. I also realized, after I had parked myself in that newly-remodeled, and quite comfortable, hotel, that I had been wanting to re-key my house, but had never gotten around to it. When I met the locksmith the next morning, he was an amazing human being. All in all, losing my keys was an okay experience.

From Ernest Holmes, The Art of Life 6.1, “God is life; not some life but all Life. God is Action; not some action, but all Action. God is Power; not some power, but all Power. God is Presence; not some presence but all Presence. God is pure Spirit, filling all space. This pure spirit animates your every act. There is a real you which lives in a real God, and the two are one. To know this is to understand the secret of life. To realize this is to understand your relationship with the Divine Presence. To realize the Law of Good is written in your own mind is to make available to you a power which can meet your every need.”

And from Rev Karin Wilson, author of the daily readings in the Science of Mind magazine for December 2022 (December 24), “Today I give myself kindness, knowing the Universe supports me, even when the sands of time feel rough beneath my feet.”

When we work with the river of life, rather than fight against it, or wish it to be other than it is, we can enjoy the ride. And what an amazing ride it is!

–Rev Janis Farmer

GOT LAUGHTER

As 2022 is coming to an end I am ever so grateful for a year filled with lots of laughter. It has been proven that laughter improves health, helps fight disease and is also a great form of exercise. Exercise? Yep. Every time I laugh my insides jog. My outsides jiggle. My eye and cheek muscles gain another laugh line. I always feel better after a good laugh. Google says the average person laughs 17 times per day. Google also says one who laughs for 15 minutes per day is getting an equivalent of 2 hours of sleep. Laughter is so good for us and I’m always ready to jump right in on it. I tend to attract the type of friends who quickly get me laughing, and I love that.

I have such kind, loving friends that their kindness to me warms my heart so but yet at the same time, just makes me laugh. Let me tell you about this past Christmas dinner and the pictures that are included.

Those that know me, know that I do not do the cooking in my home. I do know how to cook but would rather not. I cook for Easter, Thanksgiving & Christmas. My Keith does all our cooking, so we are well fed. I decided to cook a whole turkey breast so naturally there were no wings or legs. I also wanted to stuff it. It was positioned wrong in the pan but that was the only way it would stay balanced, so I just cooked it that way.

When it was all done, I laughed and laughed at my turkey. (It did taste delicious though, I must say.) I had to post about it on Facebook. “Make sure you check out this year’s turkey! It’s my pride & joy. (lol)…. This is a masterpiece. A culinary delight.” As I posted this, I thought for sure my friends would know I was making fun of my cooking. I thought I was going to get hilarious comments (my friends are funny) teasing me about my cooking skills.

Much to my surprise my friends were so kind to me. I really think they thought I was serious and they didn’t want to hurt my feelings. That’s the only thing that made sense to me. Their comments went like this, “Looks good. Everything sure looks good. What a spread. Hotel style turkey breast. Yum. This looks amazing. What is on that turkey! …Ummm…Did the stuffing explode through the breast?” They were so gentle with me, I’m sure they did not know how to approach their critique of my turkey. The laughter in our home has been nearly continuous since the turkey was revealed. I’m sure I’m caught up on all my sleep now.

As I end this year with laughter, I look forward to sharing the New Year with you in love and laughter. I hope you join us this Saturday evening on Zoom for Endings and Beginnings with CSLT. Happy New Year!

 

—Madeline Pallanes

Report from our October 2 2022 Annual Meeting by Rev Janis

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Apologies to the 6 folks, and any others, who tried to join on zoom. The sound was working when we tested it, so I don’t know what happened after that. Nothing changed, and apparently, something changed.

We had 14 people in the room. Maria ran the meeting. Each board member talked about their area of specific connection to our greater community. More on each group, team, and topic, are included in our Annual Report, which is linked elsewhere in this newsletter; specific details are shared in the monthly Board minutes. Board minutes are included in our weekly newsletter a couple weeks after each board meeting, and are made available on the website, under About Us, under Organizational Documents.

One question was raised about the number of major donors we have. Janet’s answer was a good one. We track that information by quarter, and report it to the Board, without attaching any names to the donation amounts. The information is also recorded and presented in the Board minutes. For the second quarter of 2022, we had 14 contributors who donated 80% of the monies that came in to our center. During the first quarter of the year, 80% of our donations came from 18 contributors. These are considered our ‘major donors’ and we especially celebrate them. We also acknowledge and celebrate all contributions of time, talent and/or treasure, in whatever form they occur. Generosity abounds. And as Rev Karen said last Sunday morning, “Money loves rhythm, … and flow.”

When I spoke about last January’s Community Envisioning, I mentioned that one of the desires of the community was to have more social activities. I reiterated that suggested social activities must arise from within our community. Board members can suggest activities, but they are not the only source of potential fun things we can do. These can be formal activities that take a bit of preparation and planning (see the next paragraph for how to do that), or more casual activities, such as going to Willcox to pick fruit, caravanning down to see the sandhill cranes, enjoying music and a meal at the lavender farms, or going for a hike or bike ride, or getting together to see a play at LTW, live music or a sporting event. Examples of other fun classes we have held in the past, tangentially related to learning, had to do with folding peace cranes, and coloring mandalas. Both of these are sneaky ways to expand each individual’s repertoire of meditation practices.

I didn’t mention it at the meeting, but we have an event proposal form on our website (under Organizational Documents). If someone were interested in proposing a big event, such as having a booth at the Tucson Pride Festival that happened this past weekend, this would be how they would do that. In the past, we’ve had a booth at the Tucson Festival of Books. There may be other events in town where we could have an identifiable presence. What are they?

In addition to the classes that I’ll be teaching, some of which will be certificated, Noreen Poli intends to offer an in-person, Wednesday afternoon book study on Emmett Fox’s Sermon on the Mount in January. You may remember when Noreen offered this book study four or five years ago when our office was still on E. River Rd. Also, Ethel Lee-Taylor intends to offer a book study on Brene’ Brown’s Braving the Wilderness in February. More book studies and assorted classes will arise, as other facilitators step up.

The last thing on the agenda was electing new board members. We had two seats available that had remained unfilled during the Covid years. No one rotated off the board this year. Linda Bullock expressed an interest in serving on the Board, meets the qualifications (as specified in our bylaws), and attended a board meeting to see what she was agreeing to. She spoke a few minutes to those assembled in the room, and was unanimously elected with cheers, and thanks.

We remain grateful to every single individual who participates with, and supports, this center. It is your active participation and engagement, as well as in the sharing of your time, talents and treasures that we become a more effective place of learning and growth, connection and community. We are grateful for you all.

Bells of Mindfulness

September’s Sacred Cinema movie is Walk With Me, a documentary about Zen Master Thich Nhat Hanh and the Plum Village Community. You are invited to attend the Sacred Cinema Zoom meeting this Sunday, September 18 at 3pm (contact office for Zoom link). Even if you don’t watch the movie, come discuss a favorite quote or teaching from the Master.

Watching the movie, there were two things that made a lasting impact on me. The first is Thich Nhat Hanh’s advice to a little girl whose dog recently died. You can watch the except
here: ‘Walk With Me’ Documentary film clip – Thich Nhat Hanh on dog dying.

The second was the “Bells of Mindfulness”. The movie shows that at Plum Village, every 15 minutes a bell will ring. Attendees stop whatever they are doing – talking, eating, walking, working – for a few breaths as a reminder to return to being mindful, mindful of what they are doing, saying, thinking, feeling. I wondered what that would be like. I wanted to experience this.

I was trying to figure out how to do this at home. That’s when I discovered a free app provided by Plum Village that includes the Bells of Meditation. You can get the app here: Mindfulness Apps | Plum Village

I had a free morning at home so I downloaded the app and enabled the bell. It starts you out with a 2-hour session with the bell ringing every 15 minutes. I started it and went about my day. Every 15 minutes when I heard the bell, I would stop what I was doing, take a long slow breath and check in with how I was feeling, what I was doing. Was I mindfully (or mindlessly) doing my tasks? Was I connected to my body? Was I aware of my surroundings? It did make me more aware of what I was doing, seeing, and feeling. But I actually found it distracting, taking me off task.

I decided to go another couple hours, but at a 30 minute interval. At this interval I found myself anticipating the bells. I would wait to start a task until the half hour was up or find a task, I thought would be completed in 30 minutes. I was being “mindful” in a way that didn’t serve me well.

The next day I decided to try again, but at a random 23 minutes. This way, I would not be sure when the bell would go off if I happened to look at a clock. This worked well for me. I was able to get things accomplished without being concerned about time or when the bell would ring. The bell at indiscriminate times brought me back to mindfulness, deciding if what I was doing at that time was what I should be doing.

When I find myself mindlessly going through my day, I now have another tool in my toolbox to bring me back to the present moment. “…we are alive in the present moment, the only moment there is for us to be alive.” ― Thích Nhất Hạnh, Peace Is Every Step: The Path of Mindfulness in Everyday Life.

–Janet Salese

To Playlist, or Not…

Let’s just say certain types of music are not and have never been on my playlists. There are exceptions, I get caught up in the melody or by an artist or songs. I like to hear stories etc…but a considerable amount of music contains messages that I do not want to involve myself with. If the music is exceptional I may listen to it in spite of any message but again they are exceptions.

Like most of us I was influenced by my parents and the world about how to think about things. One of those opinions influenced me to believe that country and western music was not something I should listen to. Over the years I have reinforced this conclusion and sought support from others. I held a belief that the country and western culture was a threat to my ideas.

I now understand that my thinking – my view of reality – and my happiness are connected. Holding thoughts of dissatisfaction regarding anything disrupts the ease and flow of my life.

I recently had the opportunity to accompany my wife to a business function in Nashville at one time known as the capital of the country and western music recording industry. During the preparations for the trip I made the decision to not succumb to my old thoughts and ideas.

Visit the Grand Ole Opry as planned and take things as they come.

This was my very first trip to Nashville Tennessee. I was able to experience the fluid nature of my thoughts and my ability to influence them. Whenever I find I am having thoughts that are causing some sort of resistance to my peace of mind. I do my best to consider them. In other words I avoid deciding to turn and swim upstream.

This approach proved to be optimum for my happiness because I had a remarkable time. Unburdened by the hardships that come with attitudes of various uninvited conclusions that have been a part of my thinking for a long time.

–Chris Wheeler

GOT FRIENDS

I have always had a wealth of friends and have always valued my friendships. As I am joyously approaching my 60th Birthday, I think back on my life and am overjoyed with all of my friendships. I know, I have attracted just about everyone of them to me. My friends have been with me through my hardest times and the best times of my life. I have always felt deep gratitude for the love and abundance of my friendships.

I started to think, who was my first friend that I could remember? That would be Andrew. Andrew is my only sibling and is five years older than me. Most might not consider a sibling a friend, but a friendship has developed over the last 60 years. My mom told the story that when I came home from the hospital, she was so excited and proud to show me to Andrew. Andrew ran up to the car, took one look at me and was disappointed. He said, “Oh darn! I wanted someone I could play ball with!” Off he ran to go play. Andrew may have been disappointed at the time, but he got over it.

When I was about 5, he informed me, that Santa wasn’t real. (a story for a another article maybe?) We grew up and I always felt that his presence protected me. He was my Big Brother. Once our parents passed away, (dad in 1985 and mom in 2002) we’ve both felt like orphans. We had that common bond feeling and our friendship developed deeper. I am proud to call my brother, my first friend.

Tommy Carter was the boy across the street I played with. I was about five and he was four. I came running in the house one day and when my dad asked me why, I said, “I don’t want to share my Slinky with Tommy.” I don’t remember the exact words, but I went back out and shared my Slinky with him. Gratitude to my dad, nearly 55 years ago, encouraging me to share.

Then there was Lady when I was eight. We often would sit on the front porch steps together side by side, my arm around her back. I could talk to her about anything. She would just sit there and listen. Sometimes she would come up to my bedroom and play. Sometimes she’d sleep with me, always happy to be by my side. She was my friend. She was my first St Bernard.

I continued to attract friends throughout my life. Long lasting true and enduring friends. I know I am a true extrovert and friendships fulfill something in me. The same is true for CSLT. The friendships I gained through CSLT are of true beauty. I am so grateful for you. Yes YOU!

I have always loved to be around people. One of my dearest best friends told me today, “In the middle of friendship is love and you exude love. If you’ve got love, you’ve got friends.”

• “The one who has learned to love all people will find plenty of people who will return that love.” Page 297 Science of Mind Ernest Holmes

• If you want to attract friends, I recommend reading the whole section on “Attracting Friends” Pages 297-299 Science of Mind Ernest Holmes

• “The only way to have a friend is to be one.” Ralph Waldo Emerson

• If you are reading this, and don’t know me or are a stranger to me, I learned something many years ago. “A stranger is a friend you haven’t yet met.”

So, as I’m preparing for my 60th Birthday Celebration, I am thinking about the joyous feeling I will receive as many of my friends gather together with me. I want to just stand back, absorb all their energy, watch and hear the laughter amongst my friends, knowing I am the common thread that brings us all together. We are all One.

“You’ve Got a Friend” – James Taylor is the perfect ending to this newsletter article. Sing along with me as I turn 60.

–Madeline Pallanes

Looking and Seeing

Hubble Ultra Deep Field

This view of nearly 10,000 galaxies is called the Hubble Ultra Deep Field. The snapshot includes galaxies of various ages, sizes, shapes, and colors.

I have been patiently waiting for the first pictures from the James Webb Space Telescope. On July 11th it felt like Christmas eve when I was a child. Only now it was the anticipation of receiving views from the heavens.

The first photograph, or at least the oldest surviving photograph, was taken in 1826 or 1827 by Joseph Nicéphore Niépce. So, in the grand scheme of things we have only had
the ability to photograph people and events for a minuscule amount of time, never truly knowing what countless individuals of history’s most famous people looked like.

Around the turn of the last century Henrietta Leavitt, one of a group of women “computers” at Harvard University who pored over photographic plates capturing the night sky. In studying photographs of the Magellanic Clouds, which we now know are two small galaxies that orbit the Milky Way, Leavitt noticed that certain stars varied in brightness over time, some of them in a peculiar way. “It is worthy of notice,” she wrote in 1908, that “the brighter variables have the longer periods.” In other words, brighter stars twinkled more slowly.

Around the same time, astronomer Harlow Shapley of Mount Wilson Observatory in California began to prove that the Milky Way itself was inconceivably vast. Shapley built on work by Henrietta Leavitt.

The Great Debate of “Were there other galaxies?” was resolved by a young astronomer named Edwin Hubble. He also used Leavitt’s Cepheid variable technique to measure cosmic distances, this time by finding the variable stars in the spiral nebulae themselves.

Not only do the incomprehensible distances of the cosmos amaze me, so does the rate we as humans are compounding knowledge. I am extremely happy that there are so many ways to explore and things are moving right along. Today we are seeing the universe in unprecedented detail. Tomorrow even more. The preliminary pictures are just the beginning. The possibilities are endless.

Today here and now. I enjoy my place in the universe knowing that I recognize that I am already whole, perfect and complete in essence and that I have the capacity to be whole, perfect and complete in manifestation regardless of what may be appearing as a relative condition. And it doesn’t matter how serious the condition is. There is no big or small in the Divine Mind, be it a planet or a peanut. It is as easy to create a castle as a button. It’s just a matter of whether I’m focused on a castle or a button. Thoughts become things.

–Chris Wheeler

GOT RESENTMENT

Yeah, me too. I don’t like it. How about you?

In the Resilient book study class offered last year, I had mentioned that I often feel resentful and that I didn’t want to have those feelings in me. I didn’t like how I felt. Rev. Janis casually mentioned, ‘being resentful is a learned behavior.’ I almost didn’t hear what she said. Learned behavior? I thought who did I learn THAT from? Bam. I answered my own thought immediately. I can only begin to tell you the relief I felt just hearing those words, then. Knowing it was only a learned behavior, IT IS totally possible to UNLEARN that behavior! I felt instant relief.

Jump ahead to this year and I’m in the Atlas of the Heart book study class. We started to discuss the section on resentment, and I quickly announced, “I’m the Queen of resentment.” I said it as though it were a good thing! Ha! What? What am I thinking? Let me tell you, I’ve been thinking about this ever since I said that. Every thought we think and every word we speak, is creating our future (Louise Hay). I don’t want to be the Queen of resentment. I’m happy to let someone else wear that crown.

Why do we hang on to resentment? I don’t know but it’s obvious I do. Since I haven’t quite figured out how it serves me, I know it must, since I haven’t let it go. As I was walking past the 40′ shipping container on my property, the thought came to me that ‘hanging onto resentment is kind of like hoarding.’ The effects of one afflicted by it are basically the same since it is so difficult to let it go. I speak from experience in both areas.

Let me just clarify that a bit.

Resentment: a feeling of anger because you have been forced to accept something that you do not like. (Cambridge Dictionary)
Hoarding: a persistent difficulty discarding or parting with possessions because of a perceived need to save them. (Mayo Clinic)

Resentment is a thought; hoarding is an action. Both of which I don’t want. Neither serves me well.

What serves me well are thoughts and actions that bring me peace calm and order. That’s what I want to focus my attention on. Many years ago, I showed up at CSLT looking for a little bit of spiritual guidance. I got it, and a whole lot more than I ever bargained for. I love a good bargain. How about you?

—Madeline Pallanes

Thoughts As My Sabbatical Ends

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I’ve been physically away from you all for a month. I’ve done a bit of traveling and a lot of reading, writing, thinking and resting. I’ve had a doctor appointment — a follow-up from my hospital visit 3 months ago, a couple massages, and treatments for my back. I’ve finished one quilt top and started on another, planted some flowers, and done a tiny bit of work on my house.

I’ve watched the attendance numbers sag while I’ve been away, and the contributions are not keep up with what I know the basic monthly expenses are. I know it’s summer, our winter visitors have left for cooler climates, and more than a few folks have expressed displeasure with our continuing zoom services. I remember when Rev Donald took his sabbatical in summer 2016, our attendance dropped by 35%. Of course, that was also the summer the air conditioning was out at The Gregory (it was truly sweltering in that auditorium), so I’m sure that also had an impact. I’m grateful our Sunday attendance during May was only down 15%. Thank you to those who continued to participate in, and support, this spiritual community and those who chose to enjoy and support the speakers I deliberately picked for the Sundays I was elsewhere.

I devoured a bunch of books during the month I was away, both fiction and non-fiction, and I’ve thought a lot about what’s actually mine to do. Truthfully, the Visioning class I took in February jumpstarted the process for me. The final project for Visioning was to create a personal (life) vision statement. Mine: “I live as a lighthouse, a living sanctuary, involved and willing to be changed by the process. No matter what I do, I live as love.”

One of the books I’m still working my way through is Burnout, The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle (2019) by Emily and Amelia Nagoski. In the 2nd chapter, they wrote about reframing, and reconsidering the decisions we’ve made in the past, and how we might take another look at them. I’ll share my process with you, here.

The exercise is about redefining what success looks like for the reader, and it’s built around a goal that creates frustration instead of joy. I was stunned when I realized my answer to their question, which is what inspired me to share this with you all.

Frustrating Goal: Grow, support, and sustain CSLT, aka ‘Keep the wheels on the bus’. (I actually believed this was mine to do, and it’s not.)

Why is this frustrating? It’s not attainable for me to accomplish. I can’t make any of it happen.

What can I do instead? (Brainstorming, not all ideas captured are good ideas)

  • Share what I know, and continue to explore with individuals who engage
  • Speak, teach, facilitate, write
  • Support, encourage, guide (lighthouse)
  • Continue to explore my own spiritual (includes physical, mental, emotional) wellbeing, share what I learn
  • Encourage others to do the same
  • Fret over people who choose not to show up, or quit supporting this center (presumably because they feel it doesn’t support them the way they want to be supported.) Chase anybody, ever.
  • Express gratitude for those who do show up and participate.
  • Express gratitude for those continuing to connect with each other and this center.
  • Express gratitude for those engaging in their own spiritual (physical, mental, emotional) work.
  • Discover what self-care really looks like and do that.

Next, I get to choose a couple of these ideas and decide how to implement them most efficiently, keeping my vision for my life purpose firmly in mind. And remembering that if I’m not enjoying what I’m doing, I might want to think about that some more, and pick differently.

I look forward to being back with you soon. Big hugs. — Rev J

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