Category: choice

Sometimes, Finding Gratitude Takes Work

I learned this week that another CSL minister friend has decided to retire. That makes five new thought ministers that I know of (and my universe of ministers is not that large) who have decided to retire, or just quit, in about the same number of months. The Great Resignation is alive and well among clergy, too. To be sure, most of their decisions are not entirely pandemic related. And… during these last 20 months of uncertainty and rising discontent, the job of being a minister has been even more challenging than usual.

It does seem harder to find gratitude when things don’t work out the way we want them to. I mean, after all, doesn’t the Science of Mind teach we can have what we want? No, actually, it doesn’t. It teaches we can experience what we are willing to become. There’s a big, and important, difference.

Holmes wrote in The 1926 Science of Mind 154-155, “Everyone automatically attracts to themselves just what they are, and you may set it down that, wherever you are, however intolerable the situation may be, it is just where you belong. There is no power in the Universe but yourself that can get you out of it. Someone may help you on the road to realization, but substantiality and permanence can come only through the consciousness of your own life and thought. Each must bring themselves to the point where there is no misfortune, no calamity, no accident, no trouble, no confusion; where there is nothing but plenty, peace, power, Life and Truth. They should definitely, daily, using their own name, declare the truth about themselves, realizing that as they reflect their statements into Consciousness, they will be operated upon by It.”

If I look out at the world in front of my eyes (some would call this the ‘real world’, I don’t), and see things I don’t like, what are my choices, really? I can criticize, demean, demand, distain, disrespect, destroy, etc … what I’m looking at, or I can decide that I must not see the whole picture, and I can choose to see the same situation with ‘God eyes’, remembering that, somehow, what I’m experiencing is for my continued awakening.

Freed Roman slave Epictetus was quoted as saying, “It is easy to praise providence for anything that may happen if you have two qualities: a complete view of what has actually happened in each instance, and a sense of gratitude. Without gratitude, what is the point of seeing, and without seeing, what is the object of gratitude?”

Do we ever have a ‘complete view of what has actually happened in each instance’, really?

What are the gifts that I perceive, and receive, from my friends who have decided that continuing to serve as ministers doesn’t support their continued wellbeing? How can I find gratitude for their decisions? First, I get to look at why their decisions unsettle or disturb me. Then I get to look at how their decisions inform and influence me.

I’ll look at the unsettling aspect first. These last 20 months have been the hardest, most unpleasant, work I’ve ever done, and we’re not yet done with this pandemic experience. I have felt the urge to just run away. A friend told me just this past week that if she were in my position, she’d already have been ‘outta here’. However, to quote Jack Kornfield, ‘Wherever you go, there you are.’ Leaving doesn’t actually solve the issue.

What’s the gift in the situation? Where’s the pony in the barn full of manure? How can I change my mind about these present circumstances and find gratitude? Holmes gives us clues in The Science of Mind 411.3, “We can sit in the shade, or move into the sunshine. Sitting in the shadow, we may not really believe that there is any sunshine. But the sun would be there all the time. All the time we are in bondage, real freedom exists. It is there, but we must awake to it. The Law of Mind as quickly creates one form as another for us, and we must allow the patterns of our thought to become molded from the highest sense of Reality we possess.”

I find gratitude when I remember what I’ve learned from my friends who have retired or quit, that I’ve chosen to do this work, and have decided that walking away right now doesn’t serve who I’ve come here to be. I discover a deeper level of gratitude when I realize I’m more guided, stronger and more resourceful than I ever knew I was. I also gratefully recognize that I’m continuously supported in so many ways, because the Divine lives and expresses in, as and through me, and in, as and through everyone I come into contact with.

Roman Emperor Marcus Aurelius wrote, “Dig deep within yourself, for there is a fountain of goodness ever ready to flow… if you will keep digging.”

Where do you find gratitude for stuff that seems hard, unpleasant or distasteful in your life?

–Rev Janis Farmer

Got Skeletons?

Every year I look forward to the trick or treaters coming to my home. I enjoy preparing weeks in advance buying only candy bars and Little Debbie cakes that I enjoy just in case there are any leftovers. Usually, the day of Halloween I need to buy more treats since some have already disappeared. I wouldn’t want to run out and must be prepared for the trick or treaters. I get such a kick out of seeing the ghosts and goblins that appear. Skeletons? Well, not so much. I guess it’s because it’s too close to home.

I’d like to say I have never had a skeleton in my closet, but there is not a word of truth in that. I had a rather big skeleton that enjoyed reminding me he was there. He scared me. I tried ignoring him by pushing him back in the closet and shutting the door. He didn’t go away. He kept reappearing either through a phone call, an e-mail, a letter in the mail, or an appearance on my credit report. It didn’t really matter how he made his appearance, he knew-and I knew- he was there. We both agreed he needed to leave my closet. He often reminded me of my error, which brought up feelings of embarrassment, failure and shame. These feelings I created with him, and just like my skeleton, I wanted them to all go away. He wasn’t going to leave me and would continue haunting me until I settled my debt with him. We needed to talk, and I needed to take action. No doubt, it was time to clean my closet.

I know we all have, or had, some sort of skeleton in our closet. The skeleton holds some piece of our past we would simply prefer to remain hidden or just totally forget. More often than not, it doesn’t remain hidden and we don’t forget. Recently, I cleaned my closet. I talked to my skeleton and took action to settle my debt with him.

I’d like to say I dance with my skeleton now, but there is not a word of truth in that.

Right now, I am repeating affirmations…

  • I forgive myself completely for mistakes I have made knowing I did the best I could at that time.
  • I let go of embarrassment, failure and shame.
  • I approve of myself.

I loving support you if it’s your time to clean your closet. There is every word of truth in that. Happy Halloween.

–Madeline Pallanes

A piece of the PIES

It has been a long break between the end of Practitioner 1 and the beginning of Practitioner 2 training. It feels good to settle into class and deepening my understanding and use of Science of Mind principles. The word “perfect” came up in our reading. We say it every Sunday “The Life of God is the only life there is, that Life is my life now, complete and perfect.”  And in my head I get stuck in the cultural definition of perfect, “being without fault or defect.” Biblical scholar Dr. Rocco Errico translates “perfect” from Aramaic meaning “inclusive of all things” (Practitioner II Training, Student Guide 24). Looking at the word “perfect” through a spiritual lens, I can resonate, be in-tune with perfection. The photo of Earth from space is a visual representation of “inclusive of all things.”

And the shift is not simply looking through a spiritual lens, but living primarily as a spiritual being.

Elizabeth Kubler-Ross’ model of humans has four quadrants: physical, intellectual, emotional, and spiritual (PIES). As practitioners (anyone who practices Science of Mind) we tap into, expand living from our spiritual quadrant, using intuition more than thought, knowing our physical being is influenced by thought and emotion (release of hormones, cortisol, etc.), shifting away from the emotional realm of good/bad, drama, and judgement, choosing to live from a center of unity, wholeness… of perfection. It is a process of being more and more in the moment, bringing myself back to center.

you cannot allow yourself to be drawn into these things that you see and hear, or let them appear as realities to you. You have to be on the watch. In spiritual matters you have to watch your step, because it is easy to be led off into the contemplation of that which is not so, and to sympathize with that which has no reality. H. B. Jeffery, The Principles of Healing, 114.

Connecting with the invisible, One Source of all of Life, is my superpower. Knowing I have infinite possibilities available to me always and in all ways.

“And now here is my secret, a very simple secret: It is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye.”  Antoine de Saint-Exupéry, The Little Prince  

Tao Te Ching

Chapter 11

We join spokes together in a wheel,
but it is the center hole
that makes the wagon move.

We shape clay into a pot,
but it is the emptiness inside
that holds whatever we want.

We hammer wood for a house,
but it is the inner space
that makes it livable.

We work with being,
but non-being is what we use.

–Maria

 

 

Friends in Far Places

I’ve met some amazing humans as part of the writing group practice that I’ve been in the past year.

Simon and I first met when we were matched up in a book-finishers group. I knew he was working on a book of bedtime stories for adults, but that didn’t intrigue me enough to read his early drafts. Once I read his draft book in its entirety, I realized he was on to something big. He’d realized that he had been parenting his children the same critical and demeaning way he’d been parented, and he wanted to do a healthier, happier, saner job with his own children.

Simon decided to write about his process of self-discovery, and extrapolated his own self-work into exploring positive techniques of communicating, correcting and engaging with his children, and his wife. His background is traditional fundamentalist Christian, and his mind is wide open to exploring how he can change how he engages with those in his world. I am delighted to have met him and get to encourage him in his progress. He published his initial book on Kindle, with intentions of polishing it, and publishing in print later.

Lately he’s been writing about doing more meaningful work, and deepening his satisfying relationships with the other adult humans in his life. He credits being part of this writing community and getting supportive feedback from all of us for his shift in his way of being. I thought there was probably more to it…

Last night he dropped in with this:

“I have done something every day for over a year now that has had a hugeimpact on my self-confidence. It is called the Self-Confidence Formula, 
and it comes from Napoleon Hill’s Think And Grow Rich. In the book, it 
is phrased as if these things would take place in the future. About a 
month ago, I changed what I say to state these things in the present 
instead of the future. I repeat it out loud, at least once a day.

First, I know that I have the ability to achieve the object of my 
definite purpose in life. Therefore, I demand of myself persistent, 
continuous action toward its attainment, and I here and now promise to 
render such action.

Second, I realize the dominating thoughts of my mind eventually 
reproduce themselves in outward physical action and gradually transform themselves into physical reality. Therefore, I concentrate my thoughts 
for thirty minutes daily upon the task of thinking of the person I 
intend to become, thereby creating in my mind a clear, mental picture ofthat person.

Third, I know through the principle of autosuggestion, any desire that Ipersistently hold in my mind eventually seeks expression through some 
practical means of attaining the object back of it. Therefore, I devote ten minutes daily to demanding of myself the development of 
self-confidence.

Fourth, I have clearly written down a description of my definite, chief aim in life, and I never stop trying. I am developing sufficient 
self-confidence for its attainment.

Fifth, I fully realize that no wealth or position can long endure unlessbuilt upon truth and justice. Therefore, I engage in no transaction 
which does not benefit all whom it affects. I succeed by attracting to 
myself the forces I wish to use, and the cooperation of other people. I induce others to serve me because of my willingness to serve others. I 
eliminate hatred, envy, jealousy, selfishness, and cynicism, by 
developing love for all humanity, because I know that a negative 
attitude toward others can never bring me success. I cause others to 
believe in me, because I believe in them, and in myself.

I have signed my name to this formula, I have committed it to memory, 
and I repeat it aloud once a day, with full faith that it is influencingand transforming my thoughts and actions so that I am becoming a 
self-reliant and successful person.

Signed, ___________, September 7, 2020.

I feel amazed, grateful, and exhilarated as I look back over the last 
year and see how I have grown and am growing into this firm declaration of belief in myself.”

Those of you who have read Napoleon Hill’s work, and have done this same practice recognize the covenant. Perhaps you studied it with Keith Gorley when he led a book study on this particular Napoleon Hill work several years ago. It’s not ever just about the studying, it’s about the application and the implementation.

I did smile when I read how Simon had changed Napoleon’s words from future tense to present tense. Good use of affirmations, man! And it’s the consistent, daily practice is critical.

As we move into a month exploring Edwene Gaines’ Four Spiritual Laws of Prosperity, we get to remember that prosperity is about a lot more than just money. As a member of a fundamentalist Christian faith tradition, I have no doubt that Simon is a tither. Beyond that, if you look at his assertions in his practice with Napoleon Hill’s covenant, you’ll see a very similar roadmap to the one that Edwene Gaines wrote about: goal setting, forgiveness and finding a divine purpose.

I’m excited to see what new pathways open up for those of us who choose to engage deeply with these principles and practices.

–Rev Janis Farmer

Concealing My Natural Bindi, No More

Over the past many months, not seeing people except on Zoom or wearing a mask when I did see someone in person, I stopped wearing any make-up. Now that I am starting to get out and show my face to others more, it was time to re-examined my make-up routine.

I have worn make-up to cover “flaws” and even out my complexion. Taking a good look at myself in the mirror, I noticed that the red patch between my eyebrows appeared more significant than before. It reminded me of the red dot Hindi women wear.

I did not know what it was called. An internet search led me to the following:
… one of the most internationally-known body adornments worn by Hindu and Jain women is the bindi, a red dot applied between the eyebrows on the forehead. … There are seven main chakras that run along the center of the body, and the sixth one (called the ajna chakra, the “brow chakra” or “third eye chakra”) occurs exactly where the bindi is placed.

In Sanskrit, ajna translates as “command” or “perceive,” and is considered the eye of intuition and intellect. … the bindi’s purpose is to enhance the powers of this chakra, specifically by facilitating one’s ability to access their inner wisdom or guru, allowing them to see the world and interpret things in a truthful, unbiased manner as well as forsake their ego and rid their false labels.

… The two physical eyes are used for seeing the external world, while the third focuses inward toward God. As such, the red dot signifies piety as well as serving as a constant reminder to keep God at the center of one’s thoughts. (The Purpose of the Bindi by Shuvi Jha June 5, 2018)

After reading that, I no longer saw my naturally occurring “bindi” as a flaw, something to be covered up. Maybe it’s a little more pronounced these days because my connection with my internal Guide is getting stronger. The inside is being reflected on the outside. I am listening to the internal voice more and allowing intuition to guide my actions. In fact, the intention I have been asking my fellow MasterMind group participants to hold for me is “Spirit Guides me. All is well.” My bindi is a visual reminder of this connection to Spirit. I will now proudly leave it exposed.

Got Critics?

We all have them. If it’s not our own inner critic, it’s our family and sometimes even our closest friends. Through the years I have learned how to tame my own inner critic. Tame my family? Sometimes. Tame my friends? Not so much. I wonder what it is about me, that gives them the freedom/right to voice their unsolicited critical opinion of me, to me. I haven’t quite figured that out yet.

It was a typical Tuesday. A friend of mine walked in my home and saw something that she disapproved of. She stopped, pointed at it and immediately voiced her opinion at me. “I can’t believe you are feeding her this s***!” My body immediately felt a wave of tension rise up from my feet and come out my mouth. In an instant I was in defensive mode. She picks it up and starts reading the ingredients. “I know you don’t want to hear it.”

“No I don’t!” as I looked away. She continued on, and on, voicing her criticism of me and at the same time not wanting to hear my couple-minute-long defense.

Eventually we both dropped the conversation, but I picked it back up as soon as she left. The criticism of me, and the entire conversation, went around and around in my head. She said, I said. I took it to bed with me.

I woke up to a typical Wednesday, and chose to marinate on it all day, feeling my body tense up when ever I thought of it. I just wanted to let it go. I kept thinking, “consider the source” and mentally saying, “Not a word of truth in it.” That continued all Wednesday.

Finally and coincidentally (there are no coincidences) came the typical Thursday. Just like every other day, my day started out with our morning meditation group. During our 10 minute meditation I always read Norman Vincent Peale’s book Have a Great Day – Every Day! This day’s reading was written for me. I have reread it many times since then. This is what he had to say,

“A critic is an asset, though perhaps an unpleasant one. Consider criticism objectively and whether it is justified. If it is, then try to profit by it, even when it is unfriendly. If it isn’t valid, then forget it. Don’t criticize in return, just keep on doing your job to the best of your ability. Sure, it hurts, but we are not intended to go through life without some hurt. We are supposed to make strong people of ourselves.”

Since a critic is an asset, I’ll keep my critics and continue to work on taming them. They are in effect making me strong.

–Madeline Pallanes

Hide The Ball

I don’t know if you remember that old magician’s trick with the usually three upturned cups and the ball that seems to magically move from cup to cup, and the observer never quite knows where the ball is, or how it got there. In one of our Practitioner classes years ago, a dear friend said, “I play hide the ball with myself all the time, and it frustrates me!” When she said it, I realized I couldn’t imagine a more appropriate way to describe how we keep ourselves from knowing ‘stuff’ that we claim we want to know. Most of us do this, at least sometimes. This is not a criticism. I think it’s an aspect of being human.

I’ve been using this pandemic cloistering period to work on my writing practice in a world-wide community of writers. The way this program is set up, everyone has a page of their own as a place to show their work. It’s a little cumbersome until you get the hang of it (like most things are when they are new), but it’s really not hard to find your own page. I’m watching one of my writing friends do his darnedest to keep himself from writing, and letting himself acknowledge that he actually writes well and beautifully. He’s a smart guy. He’s got a successful day job. And he’s got this other side that’s creative, poetic, profound and astoundingly lyrical in its beauty and depth.

This morning I noticed that he’d written an extraordinary piece of incredibly touching poetry on someone else’s ‘page’, and sheepishly admitted that he didn’t know how to find his own page. We’ve been in this writing program for five months. Twice I’ve offered to zoom with him on his computer to show him how to find his own page. I know of two other people, moderators of the writing program, who have also offered to assist him. Someone even made him a ‘how to’ sheet of directions, and he persists in hiding the ball from himself. I just wanted to cry when I saw his commentary this morning.

If we, or someone else, don’t want to know something, there is nothing that can be done to force them or us to see, and know. It’s not like having a puppy and rubbing their noses in it when we catch them peeing in the house. We don’t learn that way. Once we finally do wake up to the game and see though, and are willing to own our own ability, agency, autonomy, authority, responsibility and power, there’s nothing that stands in our way.

Being part of a world-wide writing community is both exciting and terrifying. I was telling one of my artist friends about it, and she was horrified at the idea of showing her work to others as it was in process, specifically so that other people could comment on it. I told her it was really quite fabulous, because one of the rules of engagement in this group was that commenters were required to be constructive, and kind. Early on when I joined this online writers’ group, I noticed the moderators, quickly and decisively, removed two people who didn’t know how to be constructive and kind.

It serves each of us to have a small group of supportive friends, who we trust and who actually have our best interests in mind and heart, and who will help us see our blind spots. Without that, it’s easy to just keep playing ‘hide the ball’, and we don’t learn and grow.

–Rev Janis Farmer

A Belief in the Potential Goodness

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What is Hope and why is it so important to sustaining a happier more fulfilling life?

I looked in the dictionary and found different definitions for Hope — words that include desire, anticipation, and expectation. But, that is not really what Hope is about.

The problem with desire, anticipation and expectation is that when a particular thing is not forthcoming, they can disappear, leading to a void into which negative thoughts and feelings can enter. I have certainly experienced this result many times.

Hope is not tied to a particular outcome, it does not depend on certainty, but a belief that there is a potential for something good to happen.

Knowing that ‘something good’ is not specific; it is merely the expectancy of a Positive outcome, which is one of the reasons that spiritual mind treatments are so helpful in redirecting my negative expectations.

Hope is a healer, puts my hurts and pains into a perspective and reminds me that things are forever changing; it is akin to trust that any negative feelings will pass.

Hope is a motivator, and beautiful source of energy that keeps me going when I feel like I have hit a brick wall.

Hope has never been more needed and believed in, than our present time, with COVID and its variants on the rise again. It helps me to know that there is still the potential for something good to come out of it.

I have already seen some positive changes in my own life and the lives of others I know, that can be partially contributed to COVID and subsequent lockdowns.

I see it as a creative opportunity for me to go within and find my true God-self and gain inner peace and trust that life has me just exactly where I am supposed to be.

“Hope is being able to see that there is light despite all of the darkness”
— Desmond Tutu

–Namaste, Janie

Didn’t It Rain?!?!?!?!

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Photo M. Horowitz

I’m so grateful for the substantial monsoons we’re experiencing in Tucson this summer. They have a long way to go before we’ve caught up to our average rainfall for this past year. I choose to believe the rains of the last month have helped reduce the deficit. When I saw the rainfall totals late last week, and the flooding in parts of town, I was reminded of an old spiritual, “Didn’t It Rain, Children“, performed and sung by Sister Rosetta Tharpe
in 1944.  She was incredible, the lesser-known grandmother of rock and roll.

The picture I posted in the newsletter shows Sabino Dam at 700 CFS (cubic feet/second) The photo is courtesy of M. Horowitz, past-president of Sabino Canyon Volunteer Patrollers. As of last Friday morning (after our big rainfall event last Thursday night), the discharge rate at the dam is about 3500 CFS (or 5 times higher than when the photograph was taken), and the water volumes briefly hit about 9000 CFS overnight. The levels on Friday still indicated dangerously high flooding. We’ve had continued rainfall over the weekend, so while the water levels might have dropped, they might still be as high. I haven’t gone out to the Canyon to look.

We have a complicated relationship with rain. Rainfall is critical to life in the desert, just as potable water is critical to human life. In both cases, too much or too fast can create problems, if we haven’t prepared adequately for them. Sometimes, it isn’t possible to prepare, and we just hold on.

The song “Didn’t It Rain, Children” tells the story of Noah’s Ark. It can be told from a couple different perspectives, like all good teaching parables presented in the Jewish Torah and the Christian Bible. It’s either a cautionary tale about what can happen when we misbehave, and ‘daddy god’ gets really upset with us and wipes us off the face of the earth. Or it can be a tale of redemption and promise, that heavenly parent god taking care of the humans who noticed, listened and worked toward their own experience of good for themselves and others (the animals). While I don’t believe this story is an actual-factual literal account of what happened to Noah and his family (if, indeed, they were actual people), or necessarily that there was a cataclysmic flood that destroyed almost all of humanity, there are some useful take-aways in the teaching parable.

We do always get to pay attention to what’s going on in our minds and in our lives, and take appropriate action. We have this failsafe partner in the Law that shows us exactly what we believe, and makes no errors in matching up what we believe with what we get to experience. And we have the perpetual promise of a rainbow when we align our actions with the highest and greatest good.

From Ernest Holmes, Hidden Power of the Bible, “The Bible is a book pointing a way to freedom under law, to guidance under love, to revelation through reason. Let us approach its study with this in mind, and much will become clear.”

“I’ve heard tell that what you imagine sometimes comes true.” – Roald Dahl
(creator of Charlie & the Chocolate Factory, James & the Giant Peach, Matilda and so much more)

–Rev Janis

The Contagion of Fear, Or Not

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It occurred to me that for the last 16 months, most of my focus has been on the Pandemic, which appeared to be under control, and now has reared its ugly head again with warnings about possible cardiac side affects from current vaccines for young people, and of course, the new highly contagious, Delta variant that has come front and center.

Thoughts of fear and dread that can easily accompany this information overload have a tendency to overwhelm me. I decided to open up Living the Science of Mind by Ernest Holmes and see what he had to say regarding FEAR. I share some of his quotes from pages 362-363, which gave me great comfort.

First of all, if you are filled with fears, do not harbor them as a great secret in your life, but find some close friend or confidant to whom you may unburden your whole soul. This will release the tension, which your fears have built up in your body. Just to talk with a calm, confident person, who can point out the reason why you need not entertain these fears is a great relief.

For the next thing, you must learn to face your fears. You should not be afraid to analyze them and you should explain to yourself just why you know there is nothing to be afraid of.

And the next thing to do is convince yourself that you would not be here were there not a Power greater than you are that put you here. Never be afraid to say to this Power and this Divine Presence: “I now lay down all my fears, doubts and anxieties. I pass them back into the great and perfect Life of which I know I am a part.”

We all need to resurrect this little child within us, who unfortunately has been so buried in our unhappy experiences that we have almost forgotten she was there. But we have not quite forgotten, have we? We all need to resurrect the confidence in life which we had in our youth.

Faith alone can heal this confusion and drive from our minds all thoughts of fear, and dissipate all anxiety. Love alone can bring harmony into our lives. So, say to yourself:

“I lay all fear aside, and in confidence and complete faith I turn to the one perfect Divine Presence, knowing that the light of Truth shines upon my path even as Divine Love guides me to the Secret Place of the Most High, where I dwell under the shadow of the Almighty.

I know there is nothing to be afraid of in God’s world. Fear cannot operate in me, nor can it go forth from me. At the very center of my being there is a consciousness of the protection of Divine Love, the guidance of Divine Wisdom, and the strength of Divine Power..

And I turn in to the great God, who knows all things and who can do all things, and say: “Lead, kindly light, amid the encircling gloom; lead Thou me on.”

All of the above really enabled me to change my mind and my mood, and I pray that Ernest Holmes wise words help others who may suffer from fear of any kind.

Namaste, Janie

 

 

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